In "We Over Me," Khadeen and Devale Ellis, the dynamic duo behind the popular social media show "The Ellises," share their secrets to a thriving, twelve-year marriage. This New York Times bestseller reveals the counterintuitive approach they've embraced: prioritizing their partner's needs above their own. Through humor and honesty, they detail their journey navigating long-distance relationships, financial struggles, parenthood, and near-divorce, demonstrating how selfless service strengthens not only their bond but also individual fulfillment. From managing finances and raising four kids to maintaining intimacy, the Ellises offer relatable advice and inspiring stories, proving that a strong, enduring relationship requires friendship, grace, and a commitment to "we" over "me."
Review We Over Me
Wow, "We Over Me" completely blew me away! I genuinely believe it's one of the best relationship books I've encountered in ages, and I've read quite a few. The Ellises, Devale and Khadeen, share their story with such refreshing honesty and humor that it feels like you're sitting down for a candid conversation with close friends. They don't shy away from the messy, challenging parts of their twelve-year marriage – the long-distance struggles, financial woes, near-death experiences, even their near-divorce. This isn't some idealized fairytale; it's a raw, relatable account of a real relationship navigating the complexities of modern life.
What sets this book apart is its central message: prioritizing your partner's needs above your own. The authors powerfully articulate how this "service over selfishness" approach isn't about self-sacrifice or losing yourself; instead, it's about building a strong foundation of mutual support and understanding. It's about creating a "we" mentality that fosters individual growth within the context of a thriving partnership. This isn't about co-dependency, as some might initially assume, but rather a conscious, continuous choice to work together towards shared goals and individual fulfillment. The book skillfully reframes this often negatively perceived concept, demonstrating how prioritizing your partner actually empowers you to achieve your own ambitions.
I particularly appreciated the practical advice woven throughout the narrative. The Ellises offer helpful tips on communication, teamwork, maintaining intimacy, handling finances, and navigating parenthood – all crucial aspects of a successful relationship. They emphasize the importance of setting your own relationship rules, avoiding comparisons to other couples, and maintaining open and honest dialogue, especially about sex. Their advice felt genuinely empowering, not preachy or judgmental. They acknowledge that they don't have all the answers, but their willingness to share their struggles, triumphs, and hard-won wisdom makes the book immensely valuable.
Beyond the relationship advice, "We Over Me" offers a broader perspective on life, family, and personal growth. It's a book about building a legacy together, about finding individual purpose within a committed partnership. The Ellises’ journey extends beyond romance; it's a testament to their commitment to raising their children in a loving, supportive environment. The way they openly discuss their parenting philosophy, emphasizing the importance of teaching life lessons alongside providing care, resonated deeply with me.
The book's approachable style, combined with the authors' engaging personalities, makes for an enjoyable and insightful read. Even though I’ve watched their YouTube channel for years, reading their story in this format provided an even deeper understanding of their values and their unique approach to relationship building. Whether you're currently in a relationship, contemplating marriage, or simply seeking guidance on personal growth, "We Over Me" offers a valuable and inspiring perspective. I wholeheartedly recommend it.
Information
- Dimensions: 5.16 x 0.61 x 7.95 inches
- Language: English
- Print length: 288
- Publication date: 2024
- Publisher: Rodale Books
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